Even though it snowed this week, it’s basically spring. And that means just 1 thing:
I know it’s only the end of March and technically I have a few more days before officially freaking out, but … no one has asked me to prom yet. It might have something to do with the fact that I’m 38 and married, but still. I am a fun time!
Pinterest is all prom this and prom that … so, of course, that’s my excuse for looking at prom dresses online. I’m pleased to see that the whole princess, full-skirt thing seems to be the direction of this year’s fashions. Because I’m 87 years old and prefer my high school girls not to look like streetwalkers. However, I did notice a startling pattern in many photos.
These girls all look like they have really bad yeast infections.
Why would the models be coached to cross their legs and put a hand in their crotchal regions if not to give the illusion of intense ladyparts discomfort?
This girl’s gonna smile and look away, so hopefully your gaze will turn to see what she’s looking at and will miss the fact that she’s trying to scratch her ladybits through formalwear.
It’s so bad, you guys, that she couldn’t even finish bedazzling her dress.
This girl isn’t livid about her unfortunate prom hairdo. She’s homicidal because of yeast.
By the hammer of Thor, she is in serious discomfort!
Know why this girl has a huge smile? That full skirt is hiding the fact that she’s taking care of business downtown, if you know what I mean.
File this under “what cannot be unseen,” but seriously. I had to share. What’s up with these poses?