Tomorrow is my birthday. I turn 39.
With so many of my friends freaking out about turning 40, 39 seems like a non-event. For that matter, turning 40 seems like none of my concern – kind of like circumcision. I know some people get really worked up about it, but it’s not really my issue.
I guess that means that I like getting older. I’m happier.
Actually, I was way more Zen before I found a white eyebrow today, and before I spent 2 hours talking about marketing with a funeral director.
But still. I am happy.
I’m happy, and I’m thankful for another year. I’m glad I’m not dead yet. Too much to do.
Here’s what I’ve learned – in no particular order:
- Marrying a computer nerd means you’ll never have to set up a router again. Totally worth it.
- Sunscreen works. Use it religiously. You’ll thank me at your 20-year reunion.
- Having a bad dog isn’t necessarily a reflection on you as a person. Some dogs – like some people – are just a few sandwiches short of a picnic basket. Having 1 of those dogs – or people – in your family doesn’t mean you’re a bad person.
- Order dessert.
- Get your thyroid tested.
- Living in an old house is a great way to hide your housekeeping skills or lack thereof. That weird smell? Old house. That crooked wall? Totally made you overlook the giant dust bunny, right?
- If you feel like going to bed early, go to bed early. It feels decadent, and it’s free.
- A kind, loving partner is worth the wait. You’ll be glad you didn’t settle.
- Being the favorite aunt is super-cool, but sometimes, not being the mom is really hard.
- People say the wrong thing. Ninety percent of the time, they didn’t mean it. Let it go. Or at least try.
- Expensive bras are worth it, especially if you’re a lady of a certain … biological wealth.
- Worrying is, sadly, not an Olympic sport. Put your imagination to better use. Like blogging!
- If it makes you feel bad, don’t eat it. (Evidently, this doesn’t apply to dogs and poo. They still eat it.)
- It doesn’t matter how old you are – you always need your parents.
- French onion dip on a BLT is pretty much the best thing ever.
- No one knows what they’re doing. We’re all faking it, to varying degrees of success.
- Because I hate cleaning my car, paying to have it detailed is worth every penny. Sometimes, it’s OK to throw money at a problem to make it go away.
- Don’t badmouth your friend’s ex because she might get back with him and then you’ll feel dumb and she won’t forget what you said. Unless he’s a total tool, then eventually, she’ll tell you how right you were.
- Everybody loves Kenny Rogers’ “The Gambler.” And if they say they don’t, they’re lying.
What have you learned so far?