Creepy Stalker Guy strikes back!

Umm … I need a little reassurance on this one.

So, last we heard from Creepy Stalker Guy, he was all texting and texting and bein’ all creepy-like. Last Friday, I received a three-part text that went a little something like this:

Cha Cha, you know drunk dialing? This is drunk texting. Stick with me here. I have been on so many bad match dates. The 1 with U was the one I looked forward to the most and had the most fun.

Just when you thought it was safe. Damn.

And then yesterday? This bit of magic:

Here is my weekly text to say hi. Why don’t you tell me to beat and leave you alone?

Freudian slip, anyone?

This text was followed up five minutes later with:

Tell me never to contact you again OR go out with me again. One or the other.

Now, for some reason, this got to me. Could he really be so dense that he considers all of this unrequited texting not as harassment, but as – gulp – courting?

I took a chance. I e-mailed him via match.

Subject: Please don’t contact me again

It’s been three and a half months. You went from friendly to creepy quite some time ago.

I hemmed and hawed before I clicked Send, but figured at the very least, I could say that I told him in no uncertain terms where I stood.

I woke up this morning to find this gem in my inbox:

WHOA! I’m offended by your comments. You said that if I called you, then you would pick up … that you still thought we could be friends. (1) Whenever your attitude changed, you should have let me know. (2) The just ignoring thing is rude … and I didn’t think you were a rude person. But I guess you are. Between the rudeness and the “bitchiest e-mail ever,” the because has come clear. You won’t hear from me again. Good luck ever getting married.

Now, I have to admit, I laughed out loud when I first read this. But I also have to admit that the last line, while obviously deflecting some hurt, does sting a little bit – in spite of the assumption that I, of course, want nothing more in this life than to get married.


Intellectually, I realize that his outburst is his way of saving face … he’s not creepy; I’m a bitch. But what bothers me is the idea that someone so unbalanced hates me.

(1) I said this to get him to not shiv me in the parking garage after I told him I didn’t think we were a match. I thought this was the standard “I don’t want to date you” comment. Am I mistaken?
(2) He’s kind of got a point, but don’t three and a half months of unanswered texts and e-mails speak for themselves?

So, don’t mind me. I’m just sitting around, being bitchy and not getting married, you know, ever. Sigh.

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