In the midst of the layoffs and subsequent restructuring, my posse at Corporate Behemoth has been focusing on what’s really important.
Men’s pants. Or, what we’re calling “Fashion Pants.”
You know what I’m talking about. The types of pants that helped Bret Michaels become The Celebrity Apprentice.
Pants with flaps.
Pants that can only be successfully donned by a select few men. Men like Bret Michaels. Not men like those at Corporate Behemoth.
No hate to my coworkers. But Fashion Pants? They are a fickle denim mistress. And all you soft software types who are flexing your style muscles on casual Fridays with your six-year-old polo and your brand-new Fashion Pants?
Don’t. Just don’t.
My Guy, who is admittedly a professional computer nerd, has ruled on Fashion Pants. “No one who works in IT should wear Fashion Pants,” he says. “In fact, Fashion Pants shouldn’t come in any size over a 30-inch waist.”
Then he got thoughtful. “I bet your brother could wear Fashion Pants.”
Now, I once shopped for pants with Poochie and his legs are so long and his waist is so buff that he has to special order his pants. So, yeah, I bet he could get away with Fashion Pants.
Except that he has taste.
Photos courtesy of Macys.com.