I have been Away. In the land of Away, I have refrained from checking my work e-mail for SEVEN WHOLE DAYS. I’ve hung out with my parents, attended the 91st running of The Greatest Spectacle in Racing, and I’ve learned, yet again, to never, ever go to Target with my mother.

Seriously. If you’re in Target and you see my mom, run. She will use her Jedi mind tricks to make you believe that you really do need that cart full of stuff, even when you just ran in to buy pantyliners or some such thing. Mom + Target = Danger!

So, now I’m back home with two more days to do whatever before returning to Corporate Behemoth. Usually on Saturdays, I’m pretty stoked with a long to-do list. But today? Today it’s 12:30 and I’m still in my nightgown. And feelin’ fine, actually. I’ve been putting off buying stamps for a whole week – what’s another two days?

I knew I needed to unwind a bit. I think I’ve accomplished that. And EGG seems to be beating the shit out of BOB. While I was Away, I talked to Mr. eHarmony for a total of three hours and 27 minutes. I received 14 text messages and three e-mails.

At first, I was all, “Hey, stalker! I’ll try to remember to wave to that van that’s always parked outside of my house.” But then I realized that a) this guy, while perhaps not good at pretending he’s mysterious and dangerous, is a seriously a really, really nice guy. A really, really nice guy who happens to think I’m the cat’s meow. And b) that of course this feels weird, b/c I’m not used to having anyone give a shit about what I do or where I go.

He Who Shall Not Be Named, I’m looking at you.

I mentioned this to Mr. eHarmony. His response? “I give a lot of shit!”

And so the crush deepens.

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