Don’t worry, I didn’t send Alice’s response to Ex-Ex. In fact, I didn’t respond at all. Instead, I’m going to wait until he replaces his stolen TVs. Then? I’m going to break into his house and steal the new TVs and donate them to a charity of some sort. And I’m going to leave eggs hidden in the attic and basement so that the entire house stinks, just like his black, black heart.
Or maybe not.
But it’s stuff like that that makes me think I should have my own sitcom. Then I remember that my life is mostly about punctuation and cleaning up canine bodily fluids.
However … Hope was right. The new boyfriend? Guy With Two Dogs. I just sort of realized that I wasn’t seeing anyone else … and I didn’t want to. I only want to see him. A lot.
As my mother said so joyfully, “You finally let your guard down and let yourself really like him. I’m so glad!”