It’s the final countdown!

My Guy and I are getting married one month from today. Hurray!

I believe he is most excited because it means a hopeful end to my complete and total bitchitude. I ain’t gonna lie – I don’t think I’m a terribly fun person to live with at the moment. Not that I’m totally off my rocker … but it’s like having a maybe kinda sorta cold. You’re just not quite right.

However, I think it’s important to learn from each other. So, here’s what I’ve learned.

1. People are crazy.

1a. As part of this crazy, people are completely ill-equipped to deal with the demands of the RSVP responsibility. They are also blind to the concept of only the people whose names are on the envelope are the people who are invited. I could write a month’s worth of posts on this particular topic and how it has made me want to cause physical harm to various folks. But I will just keep it to this one paragraph lest I have an aneurysm.

1b. As part of this crazy, people also forget that as the bride and groom, you are on a need-to-know basis and are suffering information overload. We don’t need to know the full medical report on a family friend and her tumor. Right now? Right now, we just need to know whether she’s coming or not. No report with mention of mucus, any ladyparts, or medical billing is necessary.

1c. As part of this crazy, people also forget the opposite side of the need-to-know-basis coin. That side is called If You’re the Parent of the Bride or Groom and You a) Need a Hysterectomy and b) Schedule That Hysterectomy for Three Days After the Wedding, You Should Tell Us, and Not Via E-mail at the Bottom of a Long Message About RSVPs, Like Getting Your Ladyparts Removed is an Afterthought.

I know this is tricky, especially with the rule in 1b about ladyparts. This is an exception to the ladyparts rule. Future MIL? I’m lookin’ at you.

1d. As part of this crazy, people also start sending you gifts. My Guy and I? We didn’t do shit, man. But we’re getting dishes! And today we opened the most gorgeous Le Creuset tea kettle. I almost wet myself.
Tea has never tasted so good. It makes me look a tad more kindly to data points 1a – 1c.

Image courtesy of Amazon. Perhaps you’ve heard of it.
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